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Monday, July 30, 2012

KNIVES?!

So... In an earlier post, when I mentioned "more elegant" weapons, William seemed to imply that I would bring a knife to a gun fight.  Well... I wouldn't quite do that. (Although Mythbusters DID  show that your odds aren't nearly as bad as you'd think they are, especially within 16 feet. (And there aren't too many rooms in my house much bigger than that!)  But no, I was not referring to knives.

(Nor "lightsabers," for you all you huge nerds who actually picked up on the reference!)

I was, however, referring to SWORDS. (Which is why I did not add, "from a more civilised age," in case any of the nerds were wondering about that!)  We have several, mostly ornamental, but some functional as well. My personal favorites are these:


For scale, the blade on the Main-Gauche (Parrying Dagger) is just a hair over 12" long and very sharp. (As sharp as any of the chef's knives in my kitchen upstairs.) The Sword has about a 27" blade, Spring Steel, full tang and while not particularly sharp CAN cut you. (I have cut myself with it, just once, while assing around.)  I'm am NOT trained to use them however, I simply have an interest in medieval weapons, and used to collect them.

My WIFE, OTOH, IS trained (currently to the Brown Belt equivalent level) to use HERS:


That sword? Is a 28" forged (not folded) Katana. (She's holding it off of the duvet because of the oil that's on it.)  And it's fucking razor-sharp. Scary sharp. Keep it securely locked in a rifle case sharp. In fact, neither of our two kids have ever seen it or know she has it.  And...? That's not even her GOOD Sword!  Her "good sword" was her 40th birthday present, and is still a month or two away from arriving. It's a folded Katana and it makes this once look like an envelope-opener.

Now I just put these pics up as a bit of fun. I'm not suggesting that our house is secure against some gun-wielding, home-invading psychopath simply because we happen to own a few conveniently-shaped pieces of steel. In any case, the only time I've ever had reason to use mine was one night when my dog came in, all torn up by something. Well, not having a GUN to grab to go looking for it, I grabbed what I had. Because, as my yard is fenced in, there was a chance that whatever attacked her was still out there. And I wasn't going out empty-handed, but as it was? I liked my odds.  Now, against a GUNMAN? Yeah... No thanks. I've seen Kagemusha, and I know full well how that match-up usually ends!

The thing is? A gun does not really increase your chances of survival all that much (if at all) in that situation either.  Bottom line: If you really don't want to get shot? Flee. Or otherwise, whatever you do, DO NOT confront the guy with the gun.

(And yeah, even having said that, I'd probably still confront the guy and get my dumb ass shot for my trouble.)

Also... DW would like me to add that these make us BOTH "pro-gun" folks, because once they come for the guns, the swords will be next!  (And in many paces they already have: Nunchaku, for example, are illegal in New York, for example; and her sword is completely illegal in England, excepting that she is a trained practitioner of Iaido. But she would still have to license it, and herself, to avoid legal issues.)

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